Went to the transgender health report yesterday. I suppose I consider myself a trans-advocate. However, I have an issue with the bathroom discussions.
"It's just a toilet"
I agree with three options. Gender neutral bathrooms, men's bathrooms and women's bathrooms. Even though people are allowed to use whichever bathroom they choose because it's their right.
I'm sorry to say, but as someone who has actively used both bathrooms for two years, there is a bathroom culture.
I've been men's rooms that don't have mirrors. If it does have a mirror, you shouldn't spend longer than a few seconds checking yourself out. You also don't talk, it's also socially acceptable to not wash your hands if you used a urinal.
In the woman's bathroom, you basically re-apply your whole face, chat with your girls, take a selfie. Does anyone remember that selfie song? It was a three minute music video in a bathroom. That would never happen in a men’s room.
I understand that it's just a toilet in regards to that's what the bathroom is for. The rest of the stuff is details. I would be happy with women's powder rooms that didn't have a toilet area. When I am presenting as a women I like the mystery and the presentation of the women's bathroom because sometimes you want to fix yourself before appearing before the audience. The bathroom is a place to ask for opinions and borrow supplies to make sure the package you're presenting is at the level you desire.
From my understanding, it would appear that kids are coming out as Trans earlier and earlier. They need to feel safe in the bathroom. I think schools should offer unisex bathroom options for anyone. To be honest, in school, I was also weird about using the bathroom in general. Mainly because you had to ask for permission, or try to get a quick trip in between classes and it was always awkward. ALWAYS. I wish schools were setup with more bathrooms and single room toilets throughout. That would make more sense to me.
I guess my takeaways for people are to try and be more understanding if you see someone in the bathroom who you think does not look like the label on the door. I can promise that they are in there just to pee and leave. I honestly don’t think most tran-individuals are rebels, they will try to use the bathroom they think they are most passable to go into. Sometimes when I’m in drag and I’ve sweated my makeup off, I’ll use the men’s. It’s all just a matter of perspective.